Move past the past (Post 1/5)

Relationships are the most valuable of all commodities and should be treated as such. But it’s tough to see your marriage for the treasure it is when the past keeps sticking its ugly nose in your face. How can a couple move past the past?

Because relationship restoration is such a broad topic, we’re going to break this up over a few posts. Each will identify two ways to go beyond hurt of the past and embrace the possibilities of the future.

Before we do, remember that if you’re in a situation where you’re physically in danger, reach out and get help immediately.

Today, we want to share the cardinal rule of healing:

1. Come clean

Nothing poses a greater threat to moving forward than “sweeping things under the rug.” Both husband and wife need to come clean about past relationships, mistakes, lies and anything else that they’ve hidden in their heart.

This might seem to be counterproductive, but the truth is, it’s impossible to build a climate of mutual trust unless you’re willing to show that trust by coming clean about the past.

Check out our video on transparency to learn more about the marriage (pun intended) between honesty and relationships.

2. Recognize that you’re flawed too

We all know intrinsically that we’re imperfect but, when it comes to moving past infidelity or recovering from emotional abuse, we’re often unwilling to forgive and work toward healing.

While you may not have done whatever wrong your spouse has committed, the truth is, you’ve messed up in one way or another. Mentally—and sometimes verbally—reminding ourselves that we too are flawed can take us one step closer toward reconciliation and healing.

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