5 Topics to Discuss Before you Marry

Here are 5 important things to discuss with your intended before you tie the knot.

The Past – Start your marriage with honesty. Be transparent with your soon-to-be spouse. Clear up any problems that has the potential to resurface in the future. Ask each other questions… know who you are marrying.

Be sure to discuss past relationships, if you’ve been intimate with anyone else etc.. It might seem painful and hard to talk about this but God’s Word requires complete honesty and so does your marriage. Work through it together and you’ll approach your marriage with a deeper appreciation for each other.

Goals and Ambitions – Respect each other’s goals. Can you support his or her goal even if it turns out difficult to achieve? Work together as a team. Think about goals for your marriage as well. What are some accomplishments you’d like to see happen in your first year of marriage? Five years from now?

Finances – This one is very important. How are finances going to be handled? Will you join bank accounts? Who will make the budget and makes sure things stay on track? Will you both be working or is he financially able to support both of you? Make a financial plan so that you both know where you stand.

Family – Are you both in agreement that you would like to raise a family? If so, when would you start planning this major change to your family structure? Do you want time to adjust to each other before you consider having kids? Being a parent comes with a lot of responsibility and will bring change to your relationship…plus there are the costs.

Living Arrangements – Where are you planning to live once you are married? Are you planning to rent and save up for a down payment on a home you both love? Or are you staying with in-laws while you save? Let your fiancé know whether you prefer staying near your family or to move to another location. Come to an agreement and compromise a little if you both want something different.

If you are already married, is there something you wish both you and your husband had discussed before marriage?
Or if you’d like to share a topic you and your spouse thought important to discuss please share it below!

Know someone who is getting married? Share this article with them!

22 thoughts on “5 Topics to Discuss Before you Marry

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  1. when we were engaged, we made a point to leave doors “open.” If i wondered what he would do when we’re 65 and i can’t bend over and he wondered what i thought about changing my last name, it was fair game to ask. there were no scary questions, no fears really. We could ask in person or in a facebook message, whatever worked, whenever they came. It was incredibly helpful for me to feel like i could ask whatever i needed and not fear that i’d come off as…i dont know what.

    Liked by 1 person

  2. Yes, it is good to discuss these things as it improves the probability of avoiding post marriage disagreements and strife. But, this is no guarantee that once married all will be smooth sailing.

    Another aspect that must be discussed (as it really is necessary for a successful marriage) is the area of sexuality. Expectations should be talked about. Perusing Christian marriage blogs calls one’s attention to the problem of wives not realizing that frequent lovemaking is important to their husband. Good sex is very important to the success of the marriage.


    1. Absolutely! There is never a guarantee of smooth sailing. I believe that the rough patches and coming through the storms of life can actually make a union stronger.
      Sexual expectations is good to talk about as well. I believe that caution should be taken with this topic though. Finding out what each person prefers and expects upon marriage can change as they “grow” as a married couple.
      Both man and woman should discuss their needs and expectations and continue doing so even after they are married.


  3. Great points. My wife and I talked about this a lot before we were married. It’s really helped us to have a very successful relationship. Keep up the great and relevant posts!

    Liked by 1 person

  4. Yah, all this are essential to avoid future problems. As for the past, is there a limit to what you should share? Or time you should share them?


    1. Omobim1, I believe that if two people are going to share their lives together they should be upfront about everything before they are married.
      The future is so uncertain and the past can come up in unexpected ways. Having open communication and being honest is one of the ways to avoid a troubled or broken marriage.

      Liked by 1 person

  5. Pingback: 5 Topics to Discuss Before you Marry

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